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Memoir Monday: A Wedding, A Graduation and a Parenting FAIL!

Monday, January 11, 2010

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It's Memoir Monday time again.  Sponsored by my buddy Travis over at I like to Fish.   Grab the button and tell your story.

My in-laws love big family get together functions.  So a few years ago when by sister in law was graduating from college, and my MIL's sister was getting married, they combined the functions so that everyone would be there and we could have one large celebration.

We drove up the Cincinnati.  It's roughly a 14 hour drive, if you drive the posted speed limit.  I don't.  We arrived in 12.  I usually drive less than 10 over from Valdosta to Tifton in Georgia, cause GHP loves to write tickets to their out of state drives.  But, once you hit Tennessee......c'ya!  We drive at night, and I don't think I have ever seen a cop in the entire state of TN.

Anyspeed, the events took place in a large reception hall.  There was a wedding, a toast, loads of dancing and drinking.  My in-laws are a partying bunch.  There was a graduation celebration.


After the wedding, we had the reception in the same hall.  All the kids were playing together, dancing and eating reception food.  Kamden came over to the table and asked for some orange soda in a pretty glass.  I poured out the champagne sitting in front of me and gave him my glass.  He took off to play with the rest of the kids.  Adrien and I walked outside the front of the hall.  There was a porch type area with rocking chairs.  We started catching up with my hubby's extended family.

My SIL appears and says. "I think Kamden is drunk."  I am all like, "Excuse me?"  Apparently my little munchkin was drinking from all the champagne toast glasses.  He was pouring his soda in the "pretty" glasses, and he would drink whatever was left in them.  I am totally horrified.  I turn to go into the hall to get him and the doors fly open.  Kamden looks a little green around the gills.  He wobbles towards me, and finds a spot in the grass and pukes.

And that is how my three year old got drunk at a wedding/graduation party.   

41 comments:

Noelle said...

ya gotta love a drunk 3 year old!

Travis said...

If you can't join em, join em.

I'm not sure how that applies, but for sure, if that had taken place in Oklahoma, no one would have even noticed.

"Is that kid drunk?"
"Naw. That's the Johnson boy. He's...special."

Yep.

Hillbilly Duhn said...

Oh my goodness, that is horrible! But funny all at the same time!

June said...

I have a brother that pulled that shit at the big family Christmas eve party when he was 10 years old.

Shit & puke everywhere when we got home. Mom & Dad were ready to kill him and it sure made for a real special Christmas morning.

Shell said...

That is awesome. LOL

Corrie Howe said...

Oh, my! How did he feel the next day?

kys said...

LOL! I'm surprised anyone was sober enough to notice.

Daffy said...

This is for sure one for the books! You going to buy him a champange glass for his 21st birthday?

GregoryJ said...

My first drunk was similar. At my parent's 25th anniversary, a friend and I helped ourselves at the bar. It was too strong, so we put sugar in to cut it. Duh!
I was 15 at the time, though.

Aunt Juicebox said...

Well at least he puked it up. Coulda been worse. My dad used to give me beer all the time. Intentionally. The dog too.

When we drive down to visit my sister, we go down 95. I like that drive a little better.

Ed Adams said...

CPS called, and they have your Mother Of The Year Award ready.

Just Another Momma said...

Oh my goodness. poor kid but so funny at the same time.

dana said...

You drove 14 hours for all that fun? I won't drive 2 blocks for a family function. Of course I'm one of those hermit type of loners.

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

LMAO!! Start em early, that's what i always say!!

Quirkyloon said...

So is this what we have done wrong with our extremely emotional 12-yr-old?

We don't drink.

Maybe we should start.

Ha!

Meeko Fabulous said...

I had no clue you were Mexican! LoL! j/k

Dual Mom said...

Are you trying to distract us with drunk kid stories from the fact that you haven't posted your weigh in? hmmmmm?

My brother did this once, with moonshine. I think he was around the same age.

It must have made you proud that he could hold his liquor so well.

LMJ said...

LOL! aaww..poor thing!

My sister's 7 year-old son got drunk at my baby shower. Apparently, he had been drinking from all the cups left on the tables. She didn't notice until she found him laying on the floor to the side, clutching his drumsticks, and had red eyes. He had puked on several places around the house.
She panicked and called poison control. They told her to let him sleep it out.

Eva Gallant said...

With any luck, he will have no desire for alcohol again until he's of legal age! lol

Moooooog35 said...

SPALDING!!!

The Princess of Sarcasm said...

I can already hear him talking about you in future therapy sessions!!! Priceless....

BTW, my mom grew up in Albany. They lived in Valdosta for a while too.

Holly said...

That is hilarious...because I can see my 2 year old doing it. This happened once when I was 9 and the adults were making pina coladas on vacations and each one of them kept giving the kids sips (no one realized they were all doing it) until we were all sauced.

Anyway, great story. I've been seeing your name everywhere and had to stop by!
Holly @ 504 Main

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

memoir monday! such a good idea!

Amber said...

That is too cute!

TjRenee said...

That's how I'd get a good buzz going when my parents had one of their 'get togethers'. Ahhh, good times!

Never seen a cop here in Tennessee? Really? I'm a cop magnet. But then again, I do own a donut shop. HA!

Dame Nuisance said...

Yeah, me and my siblings got a little tight at a wedding once. I was fourteen, baby brother was twelve and little sis was eleven. Throw in a Jamaican steel drum band, an Elk's Lodge and little to no parental monitoring, and you've pretty much got the whole picture.

Mrsblogalot said...

Nice. My son would have ate all the cake overlooking all those beautiful champagne glasses

Maven said...

Great stories for a wedding one day!

bwa ha ha ha ha!!

These kids!

blueviolet said...

He's gonna love that story through the years! :)

Nancy C said...

I'm glad they weren't serving Mad Dog at the wedding...give him a taste for the good stuff right away.

gayle said...

Must have been some good stuff!!

Wym said...

Well, next time make sure he has his own fancy glass. That is if he ever goes near another one! lol, poor kid. Georgia and SC are the two states that I received ALL my tickets.

Mad Woman said...

Ha! I used to do that when I was a kid. My parents would take me to functions and I would walk around draining people's glasses. Mortifying!

The Blue Zoo said...

Ha! Thats hilarious. However if it had MY kid I would have been freaking out!

Alex said...

My kids are bad enough when they're sober, who knows what would happen if they got a little booze into them.

I think I was 8 when I first downed a whiskey that my parents had left out. I believe I was doing fairy twirls off the coffee table.

ScoMan said...

I'm picturing obnoxious college jock types driving past in a convertible screaming "YEAH! WE WANNA PARTAY WITH THAT LITTLE DUDE! YEAH".. but I'm sure if that had have happened you would have mentioned it.

Secretia said...

Even the little kiddies are very clever. Think Tank Momma got fooled this time, not the next time tho!

Secretia

Jennifer G. said...

Love it! Best story EVER!!!

Danielle said...

I did the same thing when I was in junior high at a wedding and passed out in the cops yard next door. My mom was horrified.

Lynn said...

That kid will have plenty to blog about when he gets older!

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