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It's On Like Donkey Kong!

Thursday, December 3, 2009

So everyone knows this economy BLOWS more than Monica Lewinsky.  Truly it does.  I have been unemployed for going on four months.  Bleh.  Looking for a job, daily.  To no avail. Bleh.  It appears my hubs is being adversely affected too.  Although, things may work out for the best on that front. *crossing fingers*

Anybrokechic, we have had nothing but troubles with the hubs rides since last freaking October.  His transmission blew up in his Honda Odessey.  It wasn't right when we purchased the fucking thing, but American Honda blows ass too, so they were like ZERO help.  We ended up paying four fucking thousand dollars to have a new one installed by the goat fuckers at Aamco.  Yeah, they didn't fix shit.  We took it back every few thousand miles and they would reset the computer that said, "HEY I AM NOT FUCKING FUNCTIONING PROPERLY!" and send us on our way.  They finally said, "Oh, sorry bout your bad luck, you are out of warranty.  We will help you no more!"  NEVER go THERE!  EVER!

So hubs has been driving his brother's company vehicle.  He bought a small SUV that he is working to get road ready(he drives like 1,000 miles a week).  So yesterday, the BIL needed his vehicle back.  That leaves my Jeep.  Yeah.  I know.  Sucks for me.  Since the dumb fuckers smart people at the school board decided that 2.3 miles is really 1.8 (not really sure how they measure, probably with their dicks) my children are in a walk zone.  That meant that come 7:30am this morning, Mommy and her fat ass had to WALK the boys to school!

That brings me to my post's title.  Last night, while reading my blogs, I read a very inspiring post by my friend Dual Mom.  I <3 her.  You should too.  I mean who wouldn't love someone with a fabulous red high heeled shoe for a profile pic? FABULOUS!  Anylove, the bitch, evil hooker, crazy whore, posts some move your ass, get healthy inspiring us to do better, blah, blah, blah.  Talking about how sexy and skinny she was when she was working out daily.  You can read her in her own words here.  THEN, she drops the gauntlet.  A   challenge if you will.  A FREAKIN' DOUBLE DOG DARE!  Oh, no you didn't!  She DID!  However, she did at least give us the holidays.

So being that Dual Mom and I are so alike.  I HATE TO LOSE!  Ask the hubs.  It's really bad.  I am so Type A ultra competitive that I don't even let my kids win.  EVER.  That's right, I'm that Mom.  So, in order to win, I at least gotta get to the point where walking the kids to school doesn't almost kill me.  So, there is a silver lining in the walking the boys to school thing.  But I figure getting in shape a little before the challenge, gives me a leg up right?  IT IS ON LIKE DONKEY KONG DUAL MOM!  Mwah!  Love!

You can join in the fitness fun come January!  I will be ahead of you bitches, but hey, I TRIPLE DOG DARE your asses to beat me!

27 comments:

Happy Hour...Somewhere said...

You competitive bitches fry my ass. I read Dual Mom's post, too, and I will be joining you guys, but I am so not a type A person.

And you are so cheating by getting the head start with walking. Wait. That was a competitive dig, right? But I love to win at Donkey Kong. Maybe you guys will inspire my inner type A to come out of the closet. Size 6 here I come!!

Mammatalk said...

Off to check this out. I simply must read!

blueviolet said...

The triple dog dare? When I get in weight loss mode, I'm in a zone that nobody can mess with. It's just that it happens once a year and the rest of the year I spend packing it back on. :(

Daffy said...

"not really sure how they measure, probably with their dicks"

Oh my panties! I lost it there...I'm SO glad I started with your blog :O) You've ruined it for everyone else who may or may not come after you.

This may be it...done for the day...

Who am I kidding? I'm addicted.

LOVE!

Jessica said...

I'll go check her out but I can't pass up the triple dog dare . . . BTW, "not really sure how they measure, probably with their dicks" . . . LMAO!

BigSis said...

I'm too out of shape to even think about talking smack, but I should be in...

Hissyfits & Halos said...

Well, I can't stop laughing long enough to post something witty. lol "Blows more than Monica" & "(not really sure how they measure, probably with their dicks)" Simply awesome!

Noelle said...

whatever. i went to dual mom's post and that bitch should start a business doing motivational speaking. i HATE exercise. HATE it. but i'm in...

FUCK! I HATE EXERCISE!

Lily said...

I've been a gym addict before - 6 days a week, two hours per day...it was pretty insane. I was ripped.

Unfortunately, I only went so much because I HATED my ex-husband and was desperate to get out of the house.

Now that I like my new hubs, it's a little hard for me to get motivated to hit the gym. I'm about 7 lbs heavier than I used to be, but also a million times happier.

Guess we can't have it all...

Ed Adams said...

You're on, Bitch!

I needed an excuse to get my fat ass back to the Y.

This definitely does it.

Thanks.

livemorenow said...

ha, I will beat you! Each day comes to my part of the world before it gets to yours .... so when you walk, know that I have already walked.

Muhahaha ....

Meeko Fabulous said...

You make me happy when times are grey. :) Thanks for this. I always love your unique perspective on stuff. :) Also . . . I'm starting in January too . . .

Together We Save said...

Well good luck! I am not a motivated person when it comes t weight loss so I can't join in... but go for it.

Nancy Campbell said...

Good for you! Just tell your friends to BRING IT!

Dual Mom said...

I just spit coffee through my nose and all over my damn computer screen you bunch of crazy hoes!

And yeah, I'm pretty sure you're a cheating bitch, B! You can't start yet.

Does it mean there's something wrong with me that being called a bitch makes me laugh the fuck out loud? Like what is that? That's some masochist shit let me tell ya.

Oh boy, we are going to have fun with this ladies! C'mon hoes let's get going...you have t-minus 29 days and counting to stuff your face with bad food and sit on your ass...because after that..it's on and you'll have me riding your ass 24 HOURS A DAY (but not in a sexual sorta way..not that there's anything wrong with that...but I like penis.)

We so need a blog button for this.

PS. Love you too B!

Kelly said...

I hate exercise. I also hate diets. I love chocolate and cookies and grease and butter and carbs carbs carbs. I'm fat and I'm happy to stay that way.

ok, I'm in. no I'm not. ok, I am.

We'll see. I have some time to make up my mind.

Mad Woman said...

So glad I came over from Dual Mom....I'm in on this challenge. I need some competitive bitches to get MY fat ass in gear. I wish I didn't love my couch so much.

Let's DO this!

Carol said...

You had me at Goat Fuckers!
Ward laughed his ass off!!

Carol said...

You had me at Goat Fuckers!
Ward laughed his ass off!!

Tater Tot Mom said...

Holy Fuck! :) I so have to lose weight and sooner than later so I'm definitely going to check this out. I was just waiting for someone to use goat fuckers in their blog! Love it!

Raoulysgirl said...

I'm over from Dual Mom's. I like the company, so I'm a new follower!!!

The Blue Zoo said...

Oh my GOSH! That was SO freakin' funny!
"not really sure how they measure, probably with their dicks"
Isnt that how all men measure??

kys said...

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say "You guys win!". Congrats to your skinny asses!

The only way I can start exercising again is if I can read blogs on the treadmill. And that sounds like an accident waiting to happen.

Vinomom said...

Over here from Dual Mom - and loving it already! I'm not stating yet whether I'm in or out. I'm sorta attached to these extra ten pounds.

Aunt Juicebox said...

Yeah, I've got to get on the exercise stick. But I've been on a diet for awhile already, and determined not to let the holidays drag me under. I am going to stick with it as much as I can. Damn that chocolate peppermint pie in the freezer!

Unknown Mami said...

As far as the fitness challenge goes, I know you will be kickin' ass and takin' names.

Secretia said...

I know so many people who are unemployed right now.