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10 Things I Hate About You

Tuesday, June 15, 2010


I was telling my girlfriends this evening, I am in a funk.  I am pissy.  Which is not to say I am pissed off, you know in general.  Just pissy.  Like little things that normally wouldn't irritate me, they irritate me.  Don't get me wrong, lots of stuff irritates me on a daily basis, even when I am not pissy.

So I thought I would make a list of things that irritate me, even when I am not pissy.  General things that I think most people should KNOW, but don't.  Or perhaps they do and they are just stupid.  I used to say I was a people person, but then I discovered the majority of the world's population is stupid.  I have about zero tolerance for stupidity.  Seriously.  I don't like stupid people.  So, you can see how this would adversely affect my ability to be a people person right? Right.

I've digressed.  Back to the list.

1.)  Why do people enter through the EXIT door?  The ENTRANCE and EXIT doors at the grocery store, Walmart, Target, etc. are CLEARLY marked.  Can they not read?  Do they not care?  WHY?  What's worse, they will give those of us who can read, dirty looks when we are entering and exiting as is appropriate.

2.)  Using words/shitty grammar.  Let me explain before you all start going off on me.  I know I use made up words and I am fond of run on sentences and broken phrases.  I'm a writer, it's creative license for the love of Pete.  I am talking about people who stopped trying to master the English language at around 5 years old.  Those people who use words like tooken.  Words like learnt.  Like idear.  There is no "R" in idea damnit!  Alls.  Um, all is "all" inclusive.  It's already plural, dumbass.  Double negatives?  Almost make my head explode.  "I don't need no grammar lessons."

3.)  Driving 5 miles below the speed limit in the fast lane.  MOVE THE EFF OVER.  You are slow in more ways than one.


4.)  People who call me, on my phone, at my number and ask "who's this?".  Um...you called me.  My response is always, "Who the hell is this?"

5.)  People who call me and when I answer ask me to "hold on".  Um...NO.  I didn't call you. You called me, and interrupted what I was doing.  If you don't have time to talk to me, the person YOU just called, hang up and try later, when you have time.  If I have time, perhaps I will take your call.

6.)  People who call me to answer a text, that requires a yes or no.  If I wanted to "talk" to you, I would have called you.  Just answer the TEXT.
 
7.)  People who let their children SCREAM at the TOP OF THEIR LUNGS in public.  Really?  Look, I am a mom, and I know that you can tune that shit out, but seriously, must you subject the rest of us to what has taken you months or years to to learn to tune out?  Take that child to the restroom and correct the problem.  Take them to the car and correct the problem.  I don't care where you take them, just take them somewhere and correct the problem.


8.) Teenagers.  No explanation necessary.


9.)  Elisabeth Hasselbeck.  No explanation necessary.


10.)  When fast food restaurants "train" new people to work the drive-thru window during lunch or dinner rush.  

Well, there's my 10 Things I Hate About You for today.  It really isn't 10 things I hate about you, my Smackers.  Just "people".  I may have to do this again.  It really was cathartic.

Feel free to share THINGS you hate about "people".

32 comments:

In3Dee said...

haha! I love this idea! The crying kids, ay ay ay, for sure. Shut them up!

Melanie's Randomness said...

The training at lunch hour drives me nuts too & the whole I'll call people with a full issue that requires a call & they'll attempt to use 3 texts on me to explain it. I hate the "hold on" people when they are calling me. It's usually doctors but yeah it pisses me off too!

Buffee said...

You should really consider trying a "mood stabilizer"!

I figured out why I've been so effing pissed off and irrated the last couple of weeks or so! I was taking NyQuil instead of my sleeping pills (because I was down with the sickness). I normally take my "mood stabilizer" the same time as my sleeping pills. But since I wasn't taking them . . . . CRAZY BUFFEE reappeared! HA! Serious roadrage issues!

Oops!

Moooooog35 said...

I had a comment here but..

..um..

Hold on.

Shell said...

I want a ruling on an excemption to the screaming child rule. If I've already finished all my shopping and we are in the middle of some massively long line waiting to check out and one of my kids freaks out, well, we are just staying there. Not leaving our car when it took forever to get everything and we've already been in line for a while. Ruling, please. ;)

Quirkyloon said...

Excellent list. I could add so much more.

I live to be annoyed.

Tamara aka Cheapskate Mom said...

LOL I agree with #1 #4 and #8

jessalyn said...

bwaahah agreed. on every point.

i hate when people take illegal left turns into places that have the little fork at the entrance clearly opening so people from the other direction can enter. would it kill people to drive two more feet up the road where they can make a legal left turn?!

but i could go on with about a million more :)

Ally said...

OMG, you are too much. I love it. Just found your blog from someone's blog roll. Ugh, can't remember who now.

Is it okay that I sometimes say "idear" and "soder" as a joke. I know they're incorrect. I'd never actually write that unless in a joking text to my bff who plays along with those two words as well.

How about when people drive into the EXIT of a parking lot. Ever see that crap? OUT and IN and they cruise on into the OUT side. Hello?


Ugh and I hate that View chick too!


FourthGradeNothing.com

Salt said...

I just snorted SO LOUDLY at "Elizabeth Hasselback". Did I spell that right? Who cares. She doesn't deserve it.

Ian said...

I hate everyone and everything. Your list was gold, loved it.

That One Mom said...

You know how I feel about all of that business...

You forgot Oprah, by the way. Far worse than Hasselbeck on any given day.

gayle said...

I love your list!! #6 but calling me after I sent you an email and asking why didn't I call!! #9 Elisabeth H. drives me nuts!! I have to mute her most of the time!! Wish someone would set her straight!! She's going to be in for a shock if something pops that little bubble she's living in
#8 yes teens

Hillbilly Duhn said...

I agree with most. Except, I have a screamer. Yeah, I will admit to not taking him to the car or bathroom to correct the problem, since I would have never gotten anything done. HOWEVER - I have solved the problem by telling him to scream louder. That the people in the back of the store didn't hear him. OR point at all the people staring at us, and say see they hear you, but maybe they are confused about why, you should get louder. He shut the hell up!! YAY ME!

Teens. Blech. I have one. He sucks. Period. I love him, but he sucks.

Nancy C said...

The "Who's This?" thing caused me to say "Fuck You." on a very bad day during a very bad phone call.

Turned out it was the Police Protection Fund. Doh!

Lorena said...

Hate it when people pick their nose in traffic and think nobody can see them.

Babes Mami said...

OH man! You went in my head and pulled out what annoys me!

Mrsblogalot said...

I can't wait for Wednesday's list!! (-:

Daffy said...

We ALL know I have traffic issues so it goes without saying that I support ya 100% on that one (and really, I got yo back on them all).

The Entrance/Exit thing? Thank GOD I'm not the only one who gets worked up over that. There is a system...the system works EFFN USE IT and I won't run into you or be forced to shove my knee in your groin while giving you a dirty look.

Ummm...ditto on the text thing.

I can NOT STAND to listen or witness others masticating...the FOOD IS ALREADY DEAD. You DO NOT need to use the sheer strength of your molars to kill your food. I do not want to see it, I Do Not want to hear it....the Duck I am.

I heart you....my soul mate....

Quixotic said...

Mine for today is people who walk out of a store in the shopping mall without looking, and then STOP AFTER TAKING ONE STEP OUT!!! Yes, you stoopid mole, that means I will smack into you with my pram/shopping trolley/fist, don't look at me like I'm in the wrong!!! Just get up of the floor, apologise profusely and drag your broken ass outta my way!!!

GunDiva said...

I'm so with you on #1 & #2!

#1 - read the F*cking sign!!!!!! Enter and exit accordingly.

#2 - there's no "x" in especially. Or espresso. Makes me insane. I passed that trait onto the kids. My daughter almost failed her literature class because her teacher kept saying ex-specially, which would make Ashinator crazy and she'd just tune out.

And I'm so with Daffy on the mouth noises. Makes me want to knock people's heads off. And of course, since that's one of the things that makes me ape shit, turns out my DH chews his ice cream and jello. I can hear his teeth clacking and it makes me crazy. I usually just leave the room; it's not worth fighting over, but REALLY?

The Blue Zoo said...

Oh gosh. The list of things that annoy me is never ending!! lol

Danielle said...

I HATE stupid people and as funny as this sounds, because I SUCK the BIG one at grammer, I hate others who do.

Raoulysgirl said...

So I'm a total "word nerd." I get the pissiness from many, MANY grammatical flubs. However, the MOST piss-off-iest?

Actually, there are two.

I or me? Who or whom? There are very simple, easy to remember rules for both. LEARN IT AND USE IT PEOPLE!!!!!!

Hissyfits & Halos said...

I actually encountered 8 of those, just yesterday.

Let me sum up by simply stating....
I hate effing Wal Mart!!!!

MiMi said...

oh no, yesterday as soon as the hubs walked in the door for some reason i got in the worst mood evah. i wanted to bitch slap him and everything i could see.

Erin said...

# 9 cracked me up!!!

I hate people who take forever at the ATM and do like a million transactions and make me wait forever.

I hate people who buy one small thing at the store and leave with it in a plastic bag.

I hate people who don't let you in when you're trying nicely to merge. I ALWAYS let people in.

I hate when people are rude and condescending. I hate when they don't respect others.

yeesh.
thanks for letting me vent, brandee!

Amanda said...

Awesome post. You should see some of the people I deal with at my job (I work in a jail and have to talk to criminals). Then you'd know just how stupid a lot of people are.

Aunt Juicebox said...

My mom does this thing when she calls me, when I say "hello?" she will then ALSO SAY "hello?" as if I called her and she's answering the phone. You don't say hello, you say hey it's your mom or something. 20 years and I swear she's still doing it now so that I'll put her in a really shitty nursing home.

Michelle Pixie said...

That is a pretty great list of crap that annoys me and I am positive I could add about a million more. But I am generally pissy and people annoy the hell out of me! ;-)

The Princess of Sarcasm said...

Add when people say something like, "I really like them things." to your grammar annoyances and we might be twins!!!

*LLUVIA* said...

I LOVE THIS LIST!!!

One time, Emma started screaming as soon as we entered Wal-Mart. I got a few things, thinking that she would entertain herself looking around the store. But she didn't. I dropped everything and went home! LOL!

I'm with Shell, though, if they're screaming after I'm done shopping and I'm ready to pay...no way am I getting out of line! :p