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GWA: How Zgirlella Got Her Groove Back

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Think Tank Momma



Unleash the Attitude and share your Gratitude!


Dear Legos,
Thank you so much for making little pieces with pointy edges that fit perfectly into the arch of my foot.  They are designed perfectly to cause maximum, straight to the brain with no 15 second delay, PAIN.  I am also particularly fond of the pieces created to serve as lights on the Star Wars ships.  They hurt so good.  I am in awe of your ability to always seem to be missing pieces while we are trying to put sets together, yet the moment you touch a boy's bedroom floor, your pieces seem to reproduce like frogs after a rain storm.
Thanks for your Innovation,
Sore Footed Momma

Dear NBC,
Thank you so much for your douchebaggery and overall incompetence in supplying great Late Night programming.  Whilst I do miss Jimmy Fallon, once you pulled the plug on Coco I just had to boycott you.  Thankfully, the good folks at TBS have vision.  They have scooped up what you tossed out, you know one man's trash, is another man's treasure and all.  So come November, I get cable late night programming with Conan O'Brien!?!  HELL YEAH!
THANKS AGAIN,
Cable Lovin' Insomniac Momma

Dear Mojo,
Thanks for trying to evade me with your less than stellar ninja spook skillz.  Too bad for you I am like a SUPER SPY with SUPER FLY detective skillz!  I hunted your ass down.  Beat you over the head, and brought your bitch ass back.  BTW, trying to disguise yourself by hiding under the piles of laundry that I don't do....niiiiice.  Your spook skills might have been top notch back in the day, but they are no match, for I am the freaking Ghost Whisperer.  'Cept not nearly as annoying as Jennifer Love Hewitt and without the fake eyelashes!
Sincerely,
Will stomp you into submission if I have to hunt you down again.


Alright Smackers.  You know what to do.  Write your letters.  Then linky loo below.  I will visit, others with visit.  It'll be a great big attitude adjustment love fest.  Won't that be fun?


Before you go....leave me some SMACK!  Love!







26 comments:

Anonymous said...

So glad you found your mojo!

Did you find my Snark? Cause it seems to be missing......

Dual Mom said...

My yoga mat is your yoga mat....just sayin.

We've missed you.

Moooooog35 said...

FYI..with Legos you can build a little Lego HOLDER so, you know, no more Legos on the floor.

You're welcome.

Viv said...

I hate those legos!!!

Ian said...

LMAO, always look forward to the GWA posts by you, and ya never disappoint!

Travis said...

Fuck that Lego holder that Moog wants you to build.

Build a giant ass house to lock down your fleet footed mojo.

Then fill the house with mojo restraining things like, German Shepherd farts.

It's win win win really.

Also, fuck NBC. Except for The Office.

June said...

My vacuum cleaner has no issues with sucking up the Legos. It's my favorite way to clean Pinkus room!

Hot Damn she found her MOJO!! Woot!

My Mercurial Nature said...

Legos are right up there with tiny Polly shoes and once they make permanent indentations in my foot, they must visit the trash!

jessalyn said...

your lego issue is similar to my dog bone issue. i don't have kids, but i do have a spoiled mut. and stubbing a toe on one of his massive, disgusting ex-cow body parts is horrid. i can appreciate your pain, even sans kiddos.

Anonymous said...

Fake eyelashes? Is that how all these actors look gawgeous?

I should have known. And once again, I was totally clueless. Thanks for teaching me the ways of the world. *smile*

BNM said...

Oh those tiny toys in the foot is the worst pain ever! haha!!

Lothiriel said...

I LOVE LEGOS!!!!

I have not played with them in tens of years!!!

Macey said...

There's a special place in hell for the people who invented the sharp edges on legos.

Salt said...

I am over the moon with happiness about Conan coming back!!! I was never a huge fan of George Lopez, but I thought that was so cool of him to gladly move his show to midnight so that Coco could have the 11pm slot. Can't. Wait!

I've caught a lego in the foot a few times in the past. Of course, they were mine, but I still remember the pain.

Momma Fargo said...

I think you should build some hot stilettos out of those legos. Wouldn't that be fun? And fashionable!

Claudya Martinez said...

I wonder if my Mojo is hiding under the laundry?

Unknown said...

OH I loathe Legos... seriously they are straight from the devil I swear.. Woot woot on finding you mojo.. under the undone laundry really?? maybe that is where mine has been hiding..

Ed said...

Your mojo hides worse than my libido/

Tamara Dawn said...

lmao @ Ed!

SurferWife said...

Just so you know, I have never ever participated in another blogs feature. You popped my cherry.

Is Chelsea Lately in your late night lineup?

Danielle said...

Those damn legos are definitly foot buster!

Ducky said...

I thought immediately of you when I hear about Coco!

I'm working on a petition for Legos...I'll fax it over when I'm finished ;)

Mae Rae said...

Ha Ha Ha Ha Ha...i am not laughing at your blog but at moog and travis. I agree with Travis. "F" the lego holder. Who is going to build it? Yeah, i thought so. And I completely and utterly agree. The legos multiply. I stepped on one on Sunday night and my heel has yet to feel better. I was going to say heal but thought that would be too corny!

Angelia said...

Thank god my kids have outgrown Leggos!

Dame Nuisance said...

Am totally with you on the Legos! Hateful things, truly!

Sorry I've been MIA. Life has reasserted its nasty self and well ... keeping up with my blog muchless anyone else's has been beyond my meager talents of late. But damn I've missed the snark!

Powdered Toast Man said...

Damn those Legos!! They are a crafty bunch.