Lily's Home Birth

I've never taken a stab at this before but I saw this week's writing prompt and before I could open up my word processor the words just started flowing.  I went a little over the word count, but I hope it doesn't matter, fiction stops for no one.

I woke up in a cold sweat.  My breathing was labored.  Pain.  Such pain.   I struggled to sit up.  Rolling back and forth to get my belly situated.  I thought at least the baby is still sleeping.  Then the pain hit me again.  It washed over me in waves of sheer agony.

I thought I have got to pee.  As I pulled the comforter back it was wet.  “Shit!  Did I go in my sleep?”  Certainly I would’ve have woken up.  I wasn’t sleeping that soundly to begin with.  Then I realized it was way too wet to have been that I had gone in my sleep.  My water had broken and I slept through it?

Well, it was my first pregnancy.  I didn’t know what to expect.  I gently nudged John.  “Babe.” I whispered through gritted teeth as I tried to breathe through the pain. “Whew…whew….whew…BABE!”  No more whisper.  This was loud and startled him to a straight sitting position.  “Call Christine….tell her we’re setting up the pool.”

John and I had read so many books about how we were going to bring this baby into the world.  We decided we were going to have her at home.  A water birth, with a midwife.  We were going to go for a silent birth, if possible.  Silent in that whispers were as much as we expected from the midwife and John.  I would muffle out the moans and try to breathe through the pain.

I waddled to the bathroom and John quickly called the midwife.  I took a quick shower while John set up the pool.  I tried timing the contractions but in the shower it was hard to count.  It seemed like they were coming too quickly.  Fear fell over me as the water pounded on my shoulders.  Was I ready?  Was John?  I know we have forgotten something.  My mind wondered in the seconds between the pains.

I wrapped a towel around me.  It gaped at the side my belly was so large.  I stopped in the doorway as I saw John swishing the water back and forth in the pool.  He was making sure it was warm enough.  The sides of his mouth turned up slightly in a small smile.  I could see the anticipation on his face.  The love was shining as he carefully filled the pool.  My heart leapt with joy.  Today my family would be whole.

I sank into the pool and got comfortable.  John answered the door when Christine arrived.  She checked to see how far along I was after getting settled in and said we would be seeing our new arrival much quicker than she thought.  First pregnancies typically take a long time she had told John and me several times over through these last several months.

An hour later I was pushing.  I had been a trooper they kept saying.  I didn’t feel like a trooper.  I felt like I was being ripped in half from the inside out.  I wanted to stop.  I thought I was an idiot for choosing to do this at home.   I thought this is never going to end.  I pushed.  I pushed harder.  I gave it everything I had.  Finally….relief.  She was out.

Christine and John quickly tended to our little miracle.  I laid my head back against the side of the pool.  I watched bleary eyed as John held her up.  She was perfect.  Purple little fingers and toes, a set of lungs, she cried out, and lots of hair.  Beauty embodied.  

John’s chest seemed puffed up with pride I thought.  I felt my body relax into the water.  It was warm.  I was cold.  I was tired.  I wanted to rest.

I remember thinking we did it.  The quiet birth.  It was so quiet.  I felt the quiet wash over me.  I slipped down a little lower in the water hoping the warmth would blanket me.  I was cold.  I was beginning to shiver.  Sleep…I needed some sleep.  Wait…I wanted to hold her….but I was so tired.  I could just close my eyes for a few seconds while they finished things up.

I heard hustling and commotion.  But my eyes were heavy.  So heavy.  I felt Christine grab my hand and push gently on my wrist.  She was gently patting my face.  “Michelle….wake up.   Stay with me.” 

“I’m so tired.” I whispered out.

I could hear John on the phone.  He sounded panic stricken.  I opened my eyes but they just rolled to the side and I couldn’t keep them open.  He handed the phone to Christine and I could hear her giving vitals to the EMTs. 

“John they’ll be here in two minutes.” I heard her assure him.

John knelt next to me.  He held my hand and kissed my forehead.  He whispered in my ear.  “You can’t do this.  You have to fight.  I can’t do this alone.  Please. Chelle..please my love.  I need you.  FIGHT.”  He pleaded.

I managed to whisper out, “I love you, tell her I loved her too.”  Sleep fell over me and I was warm.

As I drifted to my ever lasting slumber I heard John say “Lily, today water gives us life, and it also takes it away.  Your mommy loved you.”

Share a Spoon - Fat Tuesday Beignets

 

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Share a Spoon
Deep Fry It Edition

This week's theme is compliments of the super fabulous Stephanie over at The Blue Zoo.  She's my most faithful Share a Spoon contributor.  There are several faithfuls, but Steph has participated in almost every edition.  She's really fond of the naughty edition though.  You know, sweets, chocolate, FRIED.  Which doesn't seem all that fair since she's a skinny bitch, but I'll let that slide.  Why?  Well, cause she works really hard at the skinny thing.
So...deep fried.  Wow!  I struggled this week.  We don't really do fried food, as I have stated previously.  As a matter of fact, Kamden saw me frying and literally gasped.  It was audible.  He said..."Um....are you FRYING something?"  I replied, "Yup!"  He said..."Mom, we don't do fried food."  I didn't want to burst his bubble and let him know that every time he eats Mickey D's he's eating fried food, so I just told him it was a special edition of Share a Spoon.
When he found out I was frying something similar to doughnuts all was forgiven!  I thought this week maybe I would fry up some veggies.  I do indulge every blue moon in the occasional side of fried squash, or fried pickles.  I could do that.  Then I thought better of it.  Then I thought...hey it's the South, there's the standard fried chicken.  Then I tossed out that idea.  Then it hit me...I mean, if I'm going to go to all the trouble of frying something, I might as well go for the gusto.  Combine my two favorite things.  Bread, and dessert.
It is after all Mardi Gras time, and Tuesday is FAT TUESDAY.  My favorite sweet treat of all times seriously has to be beignets.  There is nothing quite as fantastic as sitting at a table in NOLA, eating a freshly fried beignet and drinking fresh brewed chicory coffee.  If you've never experienced that, well....as a foodie?  Put it on your bucket list.  Seriously.
Mine aren't as wonderful as those, but.....they did certainly sate my craving for them.
Brandee's Fat Tuesday Beignets

1 ½ cups warm water

2 tablespoons sugar

1 teaspoon sea salt

1 package active yeast

2 extra large eggs

3 tablespoons room temperature butter

1 tablespoon canola oil

1 cup evaporated milk

½ cup sugar

½ teaspoon almond extract

7 cups flour

Oil for frying

Confectioner's sugar for dusting

In countertop mixer add warm water, 2 Tbsps sugar and 1 tsp salt with yeast packet.  Allow to stand for ten minutes.  

Once yeast has foamed add in eggs, butter, milk, oil, sugar and almond extract.  Turn mixer on low.  Add three cups of flour.  Allow to mix on low until flour is incorporated and the mixture looks like cake batter (smooth and shiny).

  Add additional flour a cup at a time until incorporated.

Dough should be very sticky and soft.  Turn out onto a generously floured surface and knead softly into a ball.  

Transfer to an oiled bowl.  Cover with plastic wrap directly on the dough and place in the refrigerator for 2-3 hours.

Remove dough from refrigerator.  Turn out onto a generously floured surface.

Roll out with a floured rolling pin to roughly 1/4" thickness.

Cut into squares with a sharp knife or square cutter.  Then cut crosswise.

Preheat oil (I use peanut oil but canola or vegetable oil should work fine) in large frying pot or fryer to 350 degrees.  Carefully drop dough triangles in the hot oil.

Brown on both sides until nicely browned. Takes roughly 1.5 minutes per side.  Make sure you keep the oil temp even.  If these fry too quickly on the outside the inside will be doughy.
Remove from oil and drain on paper towels.

Pour some Confectioner's sugar in a brown paper lunch bag.  Shake warm beignets in the bag until coated with powdered sugar.
My husband is a big fan of cinnamon sugar so he wanted his that way.
Serve these warm with coffee or hot chocolate!
You can see from the picture above, there is very little grease on the paper towels.  That's the thing with frying food at the correct temperature.  If you make sure your oil is the right temp...food isn't greasy!  Use a thermometer! 

The boys told me I am a SUPERHERO for making these.  So THANKS for the theme Steph!  I am totally RockStar Mom (for today anyway)!
Now it's your turn.  Share your fried favorites!  Leave me some love and let me know what your want to see for themes!  Then go visit the linkers and find yourself some more deep fried inspiration!

Share a Spoon Theme - This Ain't the Shallow End of the Pool

 

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Happy Saturday Smackers!
Theme Time!
DEEP FRY IT!

My great friend Sexy Steph from The Blue Zoo gave me all sorts of themes.  This theme is just the first one from her list.  I decided we needed to do something decadent.  Indulgent.  Naughty even.  
What's more naughty than fried food?  Plus, I wanted the challenge of coming up with a new recipe.  You see, Momma B doesn't really fry food.  Like...ever.  Alright, when I cater I do fry Parmesan Crusted Chicken Tenders.  Usually 10 pounds at a time.  Trust me, that's a whole lot of frying.   But, at home?  We don't really eat fried food. 
The really cool part of this theme is we can see sweet recipes or savory recipes.  I am hoping some of you Smackers will share some churros, or doughnuts....beignets even!  That sounds fabulous.  However, a good fried chicken recipe, fried green maters, great french fries.  Let's face it...fried food is yummy!
So get your little Fry Daddys out and SHARE your favorite fried goodies this week!

Share a Spoon - Midnight Snackin' Grilled Cheese Please

 

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Share a Spoon 
MIDNIGHT SNACKS
brought to you courtesy of
@FoodiesUnite
This week's theme came from Kim from Foodies Unite.  She has an ultra cool website devoted to FOOD!  If you are a foodie and you haven't been there make sure you go and follow!  She's fabulous!  I mean, would I steer you wrong?  Ok...don't answer that.  Would I steer you wrong when it comes to food?  Yeah, I thought not!
Each and every single one of us have had that late night craving sneak up on us and found ourselves wondering towards the fridge aimlessly at o'dark thirty!   Especially on the weekends.   Some people are slaves to sweets at night, others need that salty bite.  For me?  Well, sometimes it's sweet, sometimes it savory, but most often it's cereal, in a bowl, with milk and a spoon, please cheesy!
What is the best cheese fix, quick, fast and in a hurry?  Grilled CHEESE SAMMICHES!  Add a side of pickle and it's on!  There's nothing better than a perfect grilled cheese sandwich.  It's ooey, gooey, crunchy, buttery, yumminess!

The Perfect Grilled Cheese
Two slices whole grain bread1 slice Sharp Cheddar Cheese1 slice Provolone CheesebutterOptional (2 thin slices honey cured ham)
Butter both slices of bread.
In a nonstick pan or seasoned griddle over medium low heat place one slice of bread butter side down.
Add the cheddar cheese.
Top with ham. (if adding ham)
Top with Provolone.
Top with bread, buttered side up.
Make sure the griddle or pan is not too hot.  Cook slowly in order to melt cheese completely without browning the bread too crispy.
Serve with a pickle!
So here's the thing about two kinds of cheese.  Pick two cheeses that melt well.  These are my favorites, you can use your favorites.  I love the bite of the Sharp Cheddar for flavor and the creaminess of the Provolone.  The butter makes this sandwich perfect.  Number one, it adds FLAVOR.  Secondly, it helps brown the bread evenly when you spread it on the outside of the sandwich.  The bread...whole grain (I use wheat usually) is because white bread can cause a spike in blood sugar that late in the evening and can cause an unrestful sleep.
Parmesan Popcorn
Another favorite here is Parmesan Popcorn.  We pop a bag of microwave popcorn according to the directions on the package.  I heat two Tablespoons of olive oil and one Tablespoon of butter together in the microwave.  Drizzle over cooked microwave popcorn.  Sprinkle 3 Tablespoons of good Parmesan over popcorn and toss.  This is a really fun treat for late night movies!
Quick Pizza
My kids favorite late night snack is pizza.  I make them on either crackers (usually Triscuits) or flour tortillas.  All you need is your favorite canned pizza sauce, pepperoni and shredded mozzarella.  If using flour tortillas I brush with a little olive oil.  I keep some low-carb tortillas on hand for these.  Again, blood sugar.  Not that we are carb conscience or diabetic, just that late night snacks are bad enough without too much sugar.  Top tortilla or cracker with favorite sauce, pepperoni and mozzarella.  Bake @ 350 degrees for 5 minutes, or until cheese is melted and bubbly.
Well there you have it.  My top three cheesy late night fixes.  This girl is all about the cheese.  Haven't ever met one I didn't like.  Well...maybe one.
So, now it's your turn.  Type up your midnight go to snacks and SHARE with us!
I have lots of themes coming in from you and I am thrilled to have so many of you engaged.  Keep them coming and I will line them up!

My 10 inspired by The Blogger formerly known as That One Mom

My great friend Kristin, the blogger formerly known as That One Mom has been on a roll this week.  First, she came out of the closet.  Changed her name on her blog and Twitter, when she decided to share her true authentic self with the rest of the world.  I loved the post.


Then today, she posts her 10 Commandments of Kristin.  Her basic rules of being Kristin.  Fabulous post.  If you haven't already, go read it here.


So....I am doing my own.  Basically, these are a set of non-negotiable guidelines if you will to live by.  Everyone has them, but, writing them down and really thinking about what makes the top ten is an exercise I think we can all benefit from.


Here's my list:


1. Love thy self.  (You must love yourself before you can love others.)


2. When in doubt, opt for truth.  (The truth will always set you free.)


3. Do it with passion or don't do it at all.


4. Don't sweat the small stuff.  (The big stuff is never in short supply.)


5. Forgiveness begins with me.


6. Never go to bed angry.


7. Enjoy the moments.  (They are gone too quickly, no time to lament what you didn't enjoy the first time around.)


8. Take time when you need it.  (You are no good to yourself or others when you need a moment to breathe, grieve, cry, etc.)


9. Teach love, don't just preach it.  (Actions speak louder than words!)


10.  LAUGH.  Laugh long.  Laugh loud.  Laugh often.


So...what are yours?  Have you ever sat down and written them out for yourself?

A Party fit for a Princess in a Pink Tutu

This past weekend we celebrated Belly's birthday.  A fabulous Princess Castle Cake, a few gifts, family and friends, and great food.  It was a smashing good time.  I have pictures to prove it.

Every little girl needs a pretty pink tutu for her 1st Bday Party!

She needs a Princess Castle Cake too!

As I was thinking about how much my little princess enjoyed her party this evening, I kept remembering some things I read on blogs recently.  Moms talking about molding their daughters into this, or into that.  Carving their paths for them.  I remembered reading a blog months ago where one mom talked about not allowing her daughter to have fairy tales of princesses and the like.  Her daughter was going to be Chief Justice after all.  Her daughter was 3.


I remembered how that blog struck me on that day.  I thought perhaps I was just in a surly mood, that I was offended that she would deprive her daughter the imaginary places that I had played when I was little.  I mean, I grew up soon enough and experienced what the world had to offer.  Why was this mom so driven to make sure her daughter was everything she (the mother) wanted her daughter to be?  Yet, so quick to stifle her daughter's little imagination to dream of things that were silly.  Imagine if someone had stamped out JK Rowlings imagination.


I've also been stewing over so many of the posts I've read where moms are passing on their own demons to their daughters.  WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?  I mean, we as women want to mold our daughters into what we think they should be?  What we want them to be?  Which obviously would be something more or different than we are, yet, in addition to driving them to this success, we are going to burden them with our demons?  SERIOUSLY?


This bothers me.  What's wrong with just nurturing our children, daughters and sons alike, to be who they are?  Who they are supposed to become instead of what we think they should become.  What we want them to become.  They all come into this world with their own little personalities.  Why is it so difficult to just embrace that personality?  Help that little person grow into who they are in their heart.  


There is enough sadness in this world.  There is enough ugly in this world.  There is damn sure too much hate in this world.  Our babies will experience all of that way too soon for my liking and way too often as they grow up.  It's much easier to take that sadness, hate and ugliness if you are happy.  I want my boys and my daughter to be happy.  Whatever it is they want to be, that thing that brings them joy, deep in their hearts, that's what I want for them.  


If that joy comes from becoming an artist, or musician, I am o.k. with that.  It isn't always a lucrative choice.  They struggle to make ends meet.  However, they do what the love.  What they are passionate about.  What makes their hearts sing.  Don't you wish your heart sang everyday because you were doing what brought you joy?  Wouldn't you want that and more for your child?


Sometimes I think that it's easy to forget what makes us happy, isn't the same as what makes the next person happy.  That's an especially hard concept to grasp when the next person is your child.  We all tell our children they can be anything they want to be.  Do we really mean that?  Or is it just something we say?


The greatest gift my mother ever gave me was the gift of fearlessness.  She gave me this inner strength to just be me.  To love myself regardless of what others thought.  To never fear being told "no."  When I would struggle with trying out for something, or tackling my next accomplishment, she would always say..."What's the worst they can say?  No or hell no, right?"  And she was right.  So what if someone says "No."   What if they say "Yes!"?  If you never try, you'll never know.  Good Lord that woman was smart!  Is smart.  I didn't give her credit for that when I was a shithead teenager.


So...every day I try to encourage my children to be who they are.  I love that Kenna has blossomed into her own woman.  I love the fact that Kamden marches to the beat of his own drummer.  I love that Kooper is exactly like BDC.  A son truly could not be more like his father.  I love that when my step-son Michael is here in my home, he feels comfortable to be himself and let his guard down.  I am learning to love that Belly is stubborn, and strong willed.  *ahem*  I don't know where she gets that!

Share a Spoon - The Witching Hour

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Happy Saturday Smackers!
Share a Spoon - Theme Time

Midnight Snacks!
Brought to you today by the fabulous food lover Kim of Foodies Unite.
I titled this post The Witching Hour because, well, it's European folklore for when the "black magic" or creatures (i.e. witching, ghouls, demons, ghosts, etc.) come out.  And let's face it, for a FOODIE??  All sorts of imaginary voices start calling your name from the kitchen around midnight!  No?  Just me?
So this week it's time to share your favorite midnight snacks.  I don't care if it's chocolate cake, or grilled cheese sandwiches.  The only thing you can't post is cereal, milk, in a bowl, done.  Ha!
I have lots of great theme ideas from Kim aka @foodiesunite so now it's your turn, what do YOU want to see hear on Share a Spoon?  Also, if you have specific recipe requests, as opposed to themes, let me know.  I will share what I have or make one for you.  See...don't say I am not a giver!
Alright Smackers, I am off to Belly's birthday party.  Pictures to come this week.  Wait until you see the Princess Castle Cake I made!  It is awesome!