GWA: Slippery When Wet

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Unleash the Attitude and share your Gratitude!  

Dear Diaper Makers,

Thank you so much for making disposable diapers.  There is no way I could clean out cloth diapers.  It really just isn't possible for someone with a stomach that does somersaults at the gross to use cloth.  However, would it be too much to ask to make OVERNIGHT diapers for the teeny tiny?  You tease me with the promise of them yet there aren't any for newborns.  I realize that there aren't THAT many newborns sleeping long enough to require them, but mine does!  She sleeps for 10-12 hours every night.  I NEED OVERNIGHT diapers.  She was soaked completely from head to toe this morning.  I am NOT putting those plastic covers on her.  Those are not comfortable for sleeping. 

Sincerely,

Tired of washing sheets daily

Dear Pollen,
Thank you so much for feeding the bees and making it possible for me to enjoy that sweet nectar honey!  Oh how I love peanut butter and honey sandwiches!  Do you think though that you could move along now?  My blue truck looks GREEN because your yellow loveliness is coating it.  My head is pounding because of you.  I am getting hives.  Itching in places it ain't normal to itch!  And the nose bleeds?  GACK!  So, thanks for the sticky sweet goodness, but you can have the rest.
Sincerely,
Allergy med resistant Momma

Alrighty Smackers!  Link up!  Leave some LOVE!  Don't be the subject of my letter next week! 

Twinkle Twinkle Little Song

M

Monday evening we all went out to dinner as a family.  Kenna and her boyfriend wanted to take us all out to eat.  So we rounded up the troops and headed out.

Dinner was uneventful (which is a good thing with two ADHD boys and a newborn). We went to a buffet style restaurant and the boys were thrilled.  They enjoy having an infinite amount of choices.  I am not really sure why they want choices, they eat the same thing ALL THE TIME.  It doesn't matter where we go.  What choices are available.  Chicken strips, french fries and pizza are always on their menus.

We have to take two cars now whenever the whole family goes anywhere.  My Jeep just doesn't hold all of us.  Hell, we need a conversion van or some other gas guzzling BUS in order to cart the BRADYBUNCH whole fam damily around these days.  On the way to dinner Kamden rode with Kenna and her beau.  On the way home Kooper swapped places with him.

When we arrived back at Casa di Romano, BDC took the car seat inside and asked Kamden to hold the bottle up for the baby while he helped me get the monstrous contraption Cadillac Stroller out of my truck.  When we walked inside we found Kamden holding the baby, feeding her and singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star.  It was the sweetest moment, and I was stuck without my camera.


All three of the boys have become quite attached to their baby.  She apparently belongs to them.  She is in so much trouble when she get older.  Three MUCH older brothers?  She doesn't stand a chance of ever having a boyfriend.  I do understand their attachment though.  Just look....

(See that blanket?  All cross stitched?  It's a DUCK, from my BFF Duckalicious)

I will be posting more about that and other things I have received from my bestest bloggy buddies this weekend!!

(

(Khylee often looks like a rocker baby or either she is signing ILUVYOU with her fingers in her mouth.) 

(

(She LOVES her swing, and so does her Mommy!  It has batteries so it never stops.  It plays music, has a mobile and possibly saved my life.  HIGHLY recommend every new mom get a cradle swing.)

There is no way to resist that face!  All the boys at Casa di Romano are smitten.  Yep!  She has them all wrapped!  That's one lucky little girl!!!

Happy Hump Day Smackers!  LOVE!

 

GWA: How Zgirlella Got Her Groove Back

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Unleash the Attitude and share your Gratitude!

Dear Legos,

Thank you so much for making little pieces with pointy edges that fit perfectly into the arch of my foot.  They are designed perfectly to cause maximum, straight to the brain with no 15 second delay, PAIN.  I am also particularly fond of the pieces created to serve as lights on the Star Wars ships.  They hurt so good.  I am in awe of your ability to always seem to be missing pieces while we are trying to put sets together, yet the moment you touch a boy's bedroom floor, your pieces seem to reproduce like frogs after a rain storm.

Thanks for your Innovation,

Sore Footed Momma

Dear NBC,

Thank you so much for your douchebaggery and overall incompetence in supplying great Late Night programming.  Whilst I do miss Jimmy Fallon, once you pulled the plug on Coco I just had to boycott you.  Thankfully, the good folks at TBS have vision.  They have scooped up what you tossed out, you know one man's trash, is another man's treasure and all.  So come November, I get cable late night programming with Conan O'Brien!?!  HELL YEAH!

THANKS AGAIN,

Cable Lovin' Insomniac Momma

Dear Mojo,
Thanks for trying to evade me with your less than stellar ninja spook skillz.  Too bad for you I am like a SUPER SPY with SUPER FLY detective skillz!  I hunted your ass down.  Beat you over the head, and brought your bitch ass back.  BTW, trying to disguise yourself by hiding under the piles of laundry that I don't do....niiiiice.  Your spook skills might have been top notch back in the day, but they are no match, for I am the freaking Ghost Whisperer.  'Cept not nearly as annoying as Jennifer Love Hewitt and without the fake eyelashes!
Sincerely,
Will stomp you into submission if I have to hunt you down again.


Alright Smackers.  You know what to do.  Write your letters.  Then linky loo below.  I will visit, others with visit.  It'll be a great big attitude adjustment love fest.  Won't that be fun?


Before you go....leave me some SMACK!  Love!

The Many Faces of Motherhood

As you all know, I have a propensity to give out monikers.  Well, it's a family trait I suppose.  I've said before I have a couple of nicknames that the boys (including BDC) like to use to refer to me.  Today they added to the list.  My boys, they really love me.

So I thought I would share the many faces and names of my motherhood.

Rob Mom Zombie

This is a  new one.  Since the baby has made her arrival, I have been running on empty.  So, as I walk, and breathe, and sleep standing up, I have become Mom Zombie according the boys.  I am certain all moms can identify with this one.

   

Identifiers:

No Sleep

The Walking Dead

Could Eat the Face off ALL Family Members

GODMomZilla

Momzilla is a beastly Mother.  She stomps through the house screaming with angry feet  and breathing fire.  MomZilla typically rears her head at least one week a month.

Identifiers:

Rage

Screaming

Jumping Down the Throats of the Innocent

Knocking Shit Over and Demanding The Innocent Clean it Up.

Mommalicious

This siren typically graces BDC with her presence on date nights.  When I walk out of the bedroom dressed for dates the boys call me Mommalicious.




Identifiers:
Real clothes (Any form of PJs do not qualify)
Hair did!
Makeup DONE!

Last but certainly not least...
Moms-a-lot
This is the face of Motherhood seen the most.  The short order cook, the chauffeur, the butt wiper, the keeper of the schedules, the homework helper, the discipline giver, the unappreciated, the grocery getter, the catch all.

Identifiers:
The Doer of all things MOM.
Requires copious amounts of Caffeine.



So tell me, what do yours call you?  What are the faces of your xxx-hood?


(All images were available via Google images and modified via FotoFlexer.)

GWA: Groove be Damned

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Unleash that Attitude and share your Gratitude!

Dear Mojo,

Thanks for leaving me high and dry.  Nothing like being left hanging.  Please return ASAP.

Pleadingly,

Unmotivated Momma

Dear Muse,

Thanks for running away with my mojo.  I hope the two of you enjoyed your torrid affair.  However, I need you to get your ass back here.  I can't blog or write a book without your ass.  Please get the lead out.  I will come hunt you down if necessary.  You would prefer the method of returning on your own.  Trust me.

Pissed,

Unamused Non-writing Momma

You know what to do...so write your attitude adjustments and get back here to linky linky!

ALSO.....HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY MICHAEL TODAY!  HE IS 12!  

Pinky Promise

Yesterday, I was talking on the phone to BDC.  I don't remember how the conversation was really going until we got on the subject of the sex we didn't have the night before.  He busted out with something along the lines of you promised, and you blew me off (TWHS).  Meaning I didn't have sex not that I got the job done, as it were.  There was no promise of sex that day either.

So I argued that he passed out early, which is typically the case.  Then the conversation got interesting.  I said, "I did NOT Pinky Swear."  We giggled about it.  He wanted to know how we could pinky swear over the phone.  I said I could email him and then he would know I made the promise.  He said text "pinky swears" would work too.  We laughed and ended the conversation.

About 25 minutes later he called me back.  

Me:  "Hello?"

BDC:  "Hey, just testing my phone.  I thought it was broken."

Me:  "Why?"

BDC:  "I was sure you would've sent me a pinky swear for sex by now."

Me:  "Nice."

BDC:  Laughs...A LOT.

Me: "I love you."

BDC:  "I love you."

*click* *click*

About 10 minutes go by and the following text convo goes down.

Me:  Will trade sex for back/shoulder rub!!  Pinky swear it!!  :D

BDC:  Pinky swear

BDC:  Does that include any oral sex?

Me:  Does that matter?

BDC:  Just curious

Me:  We shall see young padawan learner

BDC:  Oh ya i keep forgetting you are older

Me:  I was thinking more along the lines, Master still has much to teach you she does.

Me:  But thanks for calling me old....ass.

Me:  *rolls eye*

BDC:  I love you more.  (this is what he sends me anytime he is trying to be funny or avoid a subject.  It's sort of an inside joke.)

Me:  Uh-huh!  Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrre you do!

Just a little glimpse at the silliness that BDC and I add to our marriage to spice things up.

What do you do to keep it spicy? 

GWA: Back Away from the baby and No one gets hurt

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Unleash your ATTITUDE and share the GRATITUDE.

Dear CREEPY Restaurant Manager,

Thank you so much for sharing the germs of every single patron that you shook hands with, with my infant!  Yes, I do realize that she is beautiful.  I know that you just can't help but ogle.  BUT SERIOUSLY, keep yo' hands to yo'self!  Even my 2nd grader knows that.  It wasn't enough that you came by and "Oooo'ed and Awww'ed."  First you touched her hair bow.   That was enough to get my hackles up.  I am certain you heard me as you walked away.  I spoke loud enough for the entire lunch patronage to hear me.  Later though, you came back, again.  And you not only dismissed the fact that I didn't appreciate your touching her clothing, but went a step further and touched her hand?  Really lady!  What part of my attitude was inviting?  Look...in the future....DON'T TOUCH MY BABY!  You and every other old lady who thinks that we are flattered that you think our baby is just oh so cute.  Mommas DO NOT appreciate the germs.  Not only that, it's just freaking creepy to touch other people's children.  Infant or not.  Do not do it.  Next time, be prepared to get your head snatched bald bitch!  I won't do it to those really old ladies.  But you were young enough that I wouldn't feel guilty!

Sincerely,

Not Visiting Your Establishment Again...EVER!

Just for you all, cause you keep asking to see the baby.

Dear Stock Boy @ The Grocery,

Thank you so much for supporting my husband in his attempts to warp my son's mind.  Severed body parts, squeezed dry of all their bloody contents over regular cabbage, is definitely a suitable explanation for how red cabbage came to fruition.   NICE.  Dude, guy code or not, NOT COOL.  While I appreciate the hub's creativity on occasion, there are things that simply do not fly with me.  Even for a second, planting a seed of doubt with my 10yo, who already hates vegetables is soooo not o.k.  Now I will never get him to eat cabbage.  And not because you had hub's back, and perpetuated his untruth, but because it gave Kooper an excuse that I refuse to argue.  It would only give BDC more pleasure.  So THANKS for that.

Sincerely,

Disapproving Science Loving Momma

Dear Spring,

Thanks for stopping by.  I appreciate the whole five seconds of your visit.  It is quite generous of you to move on so quickly making room for Summer to take your three months and adding it to hers.  That Summer, she is a greedy bitch ain't she?  Please come again, when you can't stay so long!

Sweaty Already,

Dreading the Scorcher Season

Alrighty Smackers.  Write your letters and linky link below!  I will visit you all!

LOVE!